The Art of Parties

Enjoying the party you throw is a skill, you don’t want to spend it stressed; these simple tips will help you feel like a guest at your own soirée.

The Invitation

Invite exactly the number, and the people, you ideally wish to attend a month in advance and request RSVPs by a particular date. If enough people cannot make it you then have time to cancel or consider changing the invitees. Be very clear about to what you are inviting your guests. ‘Please come for dinner...’ ‘Please come for drinks …’ If you are having a drinks party it is a good idea to make it clear that they will not be eating dinner and I always think you should advise people as to what time the gathering will end, so they can plan the rest of their evenings. ‘Please can for pre-dinner drinks between 7 and 9 pm’.

The Drinks

Many, many years ago I gave up serving red wine at any event in my home to which more that 6 people were invited. I think there must be some undiscovered law of physics that prevents this particular liquid staying in any form of vessel. If a bottle is going to be knocked over it will be the red, and a glass full of a full-bodied finds it absolutely impossible to stand up for very long. I find it easier to offer a white wine ‘flat or fizzy?’ option. As a general rule for a drinks party allow half a bottle per person, however, it is always good to have back-up.

Unless you want to be mixing endless drinks, making repeated trips to the off license, or forever apologising, don’t pretend you have a fully stocked cocktail bar. It is much easier to decide on a drink for the evening and serve just that. ‘May I get you a Martini...?’ Of course if it wise to always have the back-up white wine.

Consider the non-drinkers and the drivers too. They won’t want to drink fruit juice all night and water is very dull. Show them you have considered them too and plan something interesting.

It may sound excessive, but it is not, allow roughly three drinking glasses per guest. They will put them down and pick up new ones and you don’t want to be washing up all evening.

The Food

Even at a short drinks party you will have to offer some food. Rather than fussing over hundreds of canapés (which if you decide to do allow around 5 per person) it is much easier to create two dishes that can be placed repeatedly around the room. A cold rice or pasta salad always works but I find the easiest of all is a few large cheese boards; again do not go for lots of different cheeses instead buy large pieces of just a couple.

It is amazing how many parties one attends where the dietary needs of the guests are not considered. If you do not know you guests’ needs it is advisable to stick to vegetarian options, avoiding fish too. Many people do not eat dairy and there is an increasing occurrence of wheat intolerance too.

The Music

Even the smallest of gatherings will benefit for from some gentle background music to set the scene, break the ice and fill in the odd gap in conversation. Remember to keep the music at a level over which your guests can comfortably chat and do not be self indulgent with your selection. If in doubt, Ella Fitzgerald, works every time.

The Mood
The lighting, like the host, should be kind. Avoid harsh overhead lights, opt for zone and accent lighting and if your walls need painting, remember everything looks better by candlelight.

The Conversation

If you are mixing people who don’t know each other well you will want to keep things light hearted and the conversation following. I discovered years ago the simplest thing to do is to position something in your room that will provoke comment. Nothing works better than a statement vase of flowers. Guests will immediately gravitate towards it, comment on it and you have a hundred spin-off topics from which to draw; gardening, gardens open for charity, your favourite florists, the local high street, the colours of autumn, before you know it you will discussing Rothko with a dad you have only seen once at the school gates.

The article appears in the November issues of the SE Magazine group of publications.